UK friendly society, the Oddfellows says pocket the money with caution, as friendship gives the most valuable return on investment

A new survey shows almost half of Brits would choose cash over the thrill of spending time with friends – despite many admitting they feel lonely.

Brits said they were more likely to choose a mystery present worth £500 (48%) or receive £100 cash (47%), over going on a trip with good friends to somewhere fun (46%) or have a coffee and chat with someone new and interesting (21%).

The research also revealed how almost half of Brits (48%) admitted they sometimes feel lonely, with 18 to 34-year-olds most likely to report feeling this way (58%), compared to those aged 55+ (38%).

Despite feeling disconnected socially, Brits are more likely to say ‘no’ (56%) when invited to try a new group activity or social experience, with cost (33%) revealed as the biggest barrier holding people back from joining a community or activity group, followed by shyness (30%), and a fear of not fitting in (27%).

For those aged over 55, physical health and mobility were the most common reason for saying ‘no’ (29%), followed by location and not having any suitable events or groups nearby (28%).

The Oddfellows, a not-for-profit friendly society with a membership of mostly older adults, carried out the survey to mark Friendship Month in September.

It warns that while cash may look tempting, especially in tough financial times, its impact is fleeting and could leave people feeling lonelier. Friendship plays a crucial role in sustaining long-term happiness and wellbeing, said the Oddfellows.

Dr Andy Cope, Happiness Expert and friend of the Oddfellows, explains: “If you ask people what their happiest memories are, they will pick examples where they were surrounded by people. The top 10 happiest moments in someone’s life are experiences not products. It’s about being with people you enjoy being around.

“Think twice about taking that mystery gift. Materialism gives a short-lived shot of dopamine but the real ‘richness’ of life lies in human connection. Always choose your friends, or the potential of a new friendship.”

He added: “Social connections don’t just make life more enjoyable – they’re essential for emotional and psychological wellbeing. When we spend time with others, our bodies release oxytocin and endorphins, which boost mood and reduce stress.”

Leading by example is widow Jean Logan, from Bourne in Lincolnshire, who joined her local Oddfellows friendship group to make new friends.

She and fellow members at the Nene and Welland Oddfellows Branch recently ditched the traditional tea and cakes for an adrenalin adventure of zip lines, axe throwing and an outdoor assault course – proving that saying ‘yes’ to new shared experiences can lead to moments you’ll never forget.

Jean, who is in her 70s and has been an Oddfellows member for three years, said: “It’s a wonderful feeling to be doing something different and challenging. Any kind of socialising is good for you – no matter what your age. It keeps your brain busy, keeps you active and keeps you young.”

She added: “Let’s be honest. £100 doesn’t go very far these days, but I’ll be talking about this activity for a long time to come. You don’t have to climb up a tyre wall or play laser combat, but challenging yourself to say ‘yes’ to something like coffee with someone new or changing your routine is good.”

While Jean took on an extreme adventure, the Oddfellows is simply hoping to encourage people to push past any self-doubt and say ‘yes’ to one of their special Friendship Month taster events taking place across the UK this September.

Jane Nelson, CEO of the Oddfellows, said: “Our survey confirmed our experience of how older adults can be reluctant to give a new social experience a go.

“Our members always say that they were pleased they found the courage to try one of our activities, and that they’ve never looked back on the friendships they’ve made.

“If you’re nervous about meeting new people or concerned about the cost, we’ve got your back. We’ve hundreds of free, reduced or at cost activities planned such as walks, talks, afternoon teas and quizzes. Don’t worry we’re not going to make you head down a zip line!”

She added: “All we ask is that you take that first step and get in touch. We can take it from there together.

“And if you do ever opt for the cash, maybe consider spending it having fun with a friend!”

The national survey of 2,000 adults aged 18+ was commissioned by the Oddfellows, a not-for-profit and mutual, which was established in 1810 to support workers and their families through difficult times. It continues to provide a community united by friendship, care and charitable support. Today it has around 39,000 branch-based members based across 96 branches nationwide.

You can find your nearest Oddfellows friendship group by using their Branch Finder, or use the Events Finder to search for social events and activities happening near to where you live or online. It also runs monthly open days on Zoom.

To learn more about Oddfellows Friendship Month and to receive a free information pack and events diary, call 0800 028 1810, email enquiries@oddfellows.co.uk or go to www.friendshipmonth.com